What is it about cHaMPaGNe cAMpAIgNS???????

Disclamier: In NO WAY am I encouraging BINGE DRINKING. If you wake up after a heavy night to drinking more alcholol (BEER is still alcholol)....BABY!!!! YOU MIGHT HAVE A PROBLEM...CONSULT YOUR LOCAL AA GROUP!!!....but to my average FRIDAY NIGHT BOOZE LOVER, that once the tangy, bubbly taste hits those LIPS, you cant STOP when you POP.......HEY!!!! PARTY IS FUCKING OVER HERE!!! AA POTENTIALS, this does not apply to you....you CANT have any...you have a problem ok!!! and if YOU DONT drink, thats FINE but for the JUDGEMENTAL AND SANCTIMONIOUS ....LEAVE YOUR FAKE ASS AT HOME....WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THE CLUB ANYWAYS???

OOOooooOOOOO What is it about CHAMPAGNE CAMPAIGNS????

Sends chills down me spine. I'll smiling writing this....hold on!!! Do I need AA??? Nah!!! I just love GOOD BOOZE AND A GOOD PARTY!!! YES BOSS!!! Now there are very simple steps to prepare for a successful CHAMPAGNE CAMPAIGN....rules for women and rules for men!!!

MEN (what WOMEN are thinking during the campaign)

Rule No. 1- Dont DRINK alone....You might think you look great....like YES I bought a bottle and will drink it all to myself....NAH!!! as long as it's alcholol you're going to look like (for the average-looking man)- BUM...you might as well have bought WHITE LIGHTNING!! (for the fine ass guy) SELFISH CONCEITED BILLY NO MATES!! or you're just FUCKING UGLY!!! LMAO!! and no one whats to drink with you...DONT be ANGRY!! someone has to be...we can't all be at the TOP!!!

Rule No.2- Be around SOME FINE ASS LADIES!!! Nothing makeS you LOOK like a BIGGER BALLER than FINE LADIES AND FINE WINE!!!

Rule No.3- Dont STOP POPPING till SOMEONE drops!!! Hopefully not YOU, cuz you need to settle the BILL

Rule No.4- Throwing a campaign MIGHT get you some but it doesnt AUTOMATICALLY get you FREE ASS!!! so quit your BITCHING!!! you wanted to BALL so we helped you feel GREAT about it!!!.

Rule No. 5- Dont GET INTO FIGHTS!!! come on now!! FIGHTING IS for the UNEDUCATED, it makes you LOOK STUPID!!! and everyone will think you're a DRUNK!!! even if you're sober...


WOMEN (what MEN are thinking during the campaign)

Rule No.1- SUGAR!!! if you got that PAPER!!! LETS POP!!! Nothing is more sexy to a MAN than a woman that can get her OWN SHIT!!! if you havent (for the average-looking female) you better have some PARTY TRICKS to compensate for why your UGLY ASS is here drinking my BOOZE (for the FINE ASS FEMALE) chei!!! YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH MURDER, we'll allow you, just SIT YOUR FINE ASS DOWN, drink as much as you like and hopefully you'll lose your inhibitions. LOL!!!

Rule No. 2- Learn how TO HANDLE YOUR BOOZE!!! nothing is more UNATTRACTIVE than a FEMALE being sick everywhere ESPECIALLY in PUBLIC....if you do it round the CORNER....you are a GENIUS!!! you've just created more room!!! PARTY ON!!!

Rule No.3- PLS PLS PLS dont GET DRUNK and DIAL that CUNT that jilted you LMAO!!! after your hardwork of IGNORING him for WEEKS, you're back to SQUARE ONE looking like a PBB (YES!!! A PSYCHO BUNNY BOILER).

Rule No. 4- PLS PLS PLS this is not the time to BRING OUT YOUR JAMO DANCE MOVES!!! everyone would think YOU'RE CRAZY!!! and honestly, I personally WILL NOT stand next to you.

Rule No. 5- DONT get into a FIGHT!!! its JUST DISGRACEFUL!!! and you know you have BITS you dont want POPPING OUT!!! leave the AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOUR for the BEDROOM!!! where it would be very much appreciated....

ANYWHERE you GO!!! as long as you're a POPPING!!! you must be HAVING A FANTASTIC NIGHT!!! cuz BOOZE is OUR FRIEND!!!, CHAMPAGNE hangover is a BITCH and the half and just to add TEAM KANYE!!!! GOT TO LOVE A MAN THAT SPEAKS HIS MIND!!!! EVERYONE WAS THINKING IT, HE JUST HAD THE GUTS TO SAY IT!!!! and he only APOLOGISED cuz he's in the limelight and has to look good....unlike me hahahahaha I AINT GOT NO CORPORATE SOCIAL RESPONSIBILITY.......FREE SPEECH BABY!!!